SEXUAL RAMPAGES
by DeadSausage
Summary: Issac Clark, Master chief, Zelda, Tails, Mario, the color red in human form, and a blue man who's identity is a secret go through the adventure of a life time! Ps: yes this fan fiction is bad and yes it's a joke.


Sexual rampages

This story tells the sad and sexual story of the love between master chief, Mario, tails, blue man which won't be revealed here, Zelda, Isaac Clark, and the color red in human form.

The story begins like many others, Zelda was masterbating to soni- I mean tails whenever the bean god told her she needed to go to the mushroom castle. She put on a pink dress and sprayed herself with some lotion soni- someone game to her.

"Oh tails, your sexy penis needs a yanking and only I, princess Zelda can give to you." "EXCUSE ME MORTAL, IF YOU WOULD DISCONTINUE YOUR SELF PLEASURE FOR A CONVERSATION WITH A HIGHER BEING. I NEED SOMETHING OF YOU." "What is it Bean god?" "I NEED SOMEONE TO GO TO THE MUSHROOM CASTLE QUICKLY, IT SEEMS LIKE I HAVE NOONE TO SEND OVER THERE THAT IS QUICK ON THEIR FEET." "What about soni-" peach was shut off before she could finish her words. "WE DO NOT SPEAK OF THAT ONES NAME HERE MISS." Suddenly the bean god shut off the communication between the two. "Better go see what Mario wants, wonder why the bean God wants me to go over there so bad." Zelda was nude at the time letting her breasts fall down in front of her hoping that this would please tails' picture. She put on a yellow bra and some orange colored panties. "Wonder where my blue ones are at?" She asked herself, those were her favorite ones. "Oh almost forgot!" She brought out a bottle of unlabeled white lotion, there was a tag on it that said "To Zelda, from me." Zelda had no idea who this was from but it made her skin feel fresh and alive so she put a squirt in her hands and rubbed some in her arm pits and over her arms. She finally put on a pink dress with gold on it and braided her hair down and jumped through the black hole that lead her there.

Master chief was orbiting around the universe looking for Cortana, his search was in vain because she was nowhere to be found out there. He got a transmission from someone and had to check where it was being sent by.

"Come on Cortana, you have to be out there somewhere, I didn't kill 100,000 aliens for you to leave existence." He pointed his ship in a direction toward a wormhole and was about to choose where he wanted to be sent whenever he heard a loud his on his transmitter. He played with the frequency until it was just right and began asking questions. "Hello? Is anybody there? I'm listening!" There was just static until he heard a cry for help. "Yes, this is coming from galaxy 821-delta, we are held up in a castle and need your help. Please hurry! They're almost to-" the transmission was cut off and he was struck dumbfounded by this call, there was so much static he had to cut it off after awhile. "821-delta? That's on the opposite side of the entire universe, well I have no real choice." He punched in the coordinated and shot through the worm hole.

Red was living a normal life as Mario's sidekick, they were saving people everyday, but that's whenever red decided that he had enough. He got a job at a club somewhere outside of the city and lived as a bartender.

The joint was riddled with gangs and cheap beer, its glory days were over for about 10 years, right whenever red was hired. His days of heroism were over and they hired him as a bartender. "Hello sir welcome to the shithole around the corner." Red sarcastically said. "WATERHOLE AROUND THE CORNER!" His boss shouted, she was as old as the place and was ready to sell it for about 10$. "Right, so what'll you have?" The man didn't talk much and had a hat to cover his face and a trench coat to cover himself. "Whiskey, on the rocks." He said after a few seconds. "Hey it's your life." Just as the drink came to him an obviously drunk to oblivion man sat next to the man. "Heya man, haven't I seen ya around here?" The drunken man asked stuttering in his words. "Nope, I just decided I needed to waste some time here." The man hasn't been here in awhile but he knew the drunk was right. "Yeah! You was stalkin' about here just two days ago! Wearin' that exact same shirt 'n all!" The drunk stuttered more and more downing even more beer after each word. "You're making a mista-" the man was cut off whenever the drunk pushed his cup off the side of the bar. Everyone in the bar was silent, even the gangsters discussing matters of literal life and death. "Listen man! I don't appreciate being lied to! I know exactly that you've bee-" he was eventually cut off by the man holding his throat. "NOW YOU LISTEN AND YOU LISTEN GOOD YOU DRUNK ASSHOLE I'VE YET TO EVEN SIP A DRINK FROM THIS PLACE AND YOUR DRUNKEN ASS HAS ALREADY MADE ME LOSE MY APPETITE." The man help him for a bit longer stopping him from breathing whenever red told him to let him go. "Alright that's enough, he knows what he's done." The drunk dropped onto the floor on all fours and muscled enough strength for him to step up and run out of the bar. "Sorry 'bout William, whenever to rains it pours am I right?" "Heh, yeah you're right, better tell you why I'm really here now." "What's that?" Red asked while fixing another whiskey for the man. He took his hat off and revealed his identity. As Red turned around to give him the whiskey he dropped the glass in surprise. The figure turned out to be his long lost friend Mario. "M-Mario! What the hell are you doing in a shithole like this?" "I'm looking for my friend, any idea where he's at?" Red knew he was joking. "Well I don't know what to say, what'cha need?" "You, I've gotten word that bowser is back in the mushroom castle and is causing chaos, and you're my only chance, we've got to save peach." "Heh, just like old times?" "Just like old times" they both said separately.

Tails was in bed whenever he got a transmission, knuckles was giving him a harsh pounding ever since a blue man left them to find a higher purpose in life. Tails had felt empty in the insides but knuckle's red cock filled her with just enough energy juice to continue

"Oh knuckles! I can't take much more of it! Take back a few inches!" Tails was screaming as knuckles buried his MEMBER inside him. "Oh sorry tails, I'm just trying to compensate for my loss of a friend." "We both are." After this fucking session knuckles curled up to tails and asked him if he felt like talking. "So, you feel like talking about-" knuckles was cut off by an ear blistering screech. "The oven!" Tails screeched with maximum certainty. "No you idiotic two tailed freak that's the transmitter!" Amy said rushing into the room. "Oh Amy! Umm lemme put some clothes on" "don't bother, I know your size and I know that tails has a micro penis." "Hey! Ummm, it's bigger than yours!" Tails tried so hard to make a comeback but harshly failed. "Whatever you say sweet cheeks, anyways the transmissions coming from... 821-delta? Where's that at?" "I think that's somewhere near our plumber's house." Knuckles added. "Gah! Knuckles put some pants on!" Amy was surprised to see knuckles bare ass naked in front of her. "What? You said you've already seen it." "No but, whatever just get dressed, you and me will try to see what they need while tails, take this radio and we'll talk with you the whole way there." As tails was about to step through the portal he said bye to knuckles and whenever he winked at him Amy shoved tails into the portal.

Issac was left for dead on an escape pod space ship, drifting through space looking through transmissions and seeing the sights. He had little food or water, but he had enough fuel to go anywhere.

"Damnit! I've spent days trying to find my crew and they've just left me to die, I give up on them. If they don't want me then I don't want me." Issac was just about to let go of his sanity whenever he heard a familiar voice, the voice was hard to pinpoint but what really struck him as surprising was what they had to say. "821-Delta, that's 821-Delta." The transmission was that repeating and an encrypted message that could only be revealed by a larger computer and one that wasn't running off of AA batteries and hope. "821 Delta? Never heard of that before, maybe they'll be friendly enough to let me stay for awhile and point me in the right direction." Issac quickly pinpointed the nearest wormhole and set his sights to 821-Delta.

Bowser was destroying the mushroom kingdom and was about to capture peach whenever a man in a red suit showed up with his sidekick.

"That's it bub, your days of terror are over!" Red shouted at the overgrown tortoise. "Yeah? Who's gonna stop me? You're just a color! And your boy there, what's he gonna do step on me? Hahaha!" "Exactly!" Mario exclaimed while running up to a floating block right next to bowser's head. "TAKE-A DIS MOTHER FUCKER!" Mario said in an extremely Italian voice. "Noooo!" Bowser screamed while he was shrinking in size until it was revealed that he was not bowser, it was a huge circular black hole! Mario and red were astonished to see a gigantic ship fly through the small hole, they both exchanged strange looks at each other and saw as the ship levitated through the air for about five seconds until only falling about 30 feet away from the portal. "What the hell is that?" Red asked but knew he would not get a response. They both went up to the broken ship and saw a door on it, as they both exchanged looks to one another a man in full armor walked out. "Any of you know where a Cortana is by any chance?"

Just after a huge spacecraft fell through the hole another figure came through it, a woman in a pink dress, it was none other than Zelda. The first thing that she saw whenever she came through was a yellow puff in front of her.

Tails has no idea what to expect whenever he stepped through the portal. But he found something that met his eye.

"Ouch, what's that on my face? Where am I?" Zelda tried getting answers but no one was answering them. Whenever she could see she saw a man in a red jumpsuit, a solid colored man, and a huge figure in armor all staring at her, there was also an overgrown squirrel next to her. "Where am I?" She asked after getting off the ground. "What's left of the mushroom kingdom." Mario answered her. "Oh Mario and red, but who's this hunk of metal?" "Commander Chief, Master Chief." "Ok, but why was I called here?" "What do you mean?" Mario asked the pink princess. "The bean god called me to be here." Zelda answered. "The what? Anyways you're here now might as well help us fix our friends ship here." Tails finally awoke and they gave him the exact same run down of what happened, so was Issac Clark.

They were finally all together, whenever they were all inside of master chief's ship the door shut and stayed shut. Just as they all realized they were stuck in a voice started talking to them

"Ok that should do it!" Tails said as he was working on the front of the ship with Master Chief and Issac. "So when should we start looking at my ship?" Asked Issac Clark, he got no response. "Hey tails, metal guy and Issac guy! Can you help us move his bed in the bedroom!" Shouted Red. They all went inside the ship and Issac shut the door, little did he know that THIS WAS A TERRIBLE DECISION! "And that should do it!" Tails repeated twice in this chapter. "Ok cool, so I guess you can all go home now." Mario said to everyone. "But what about my sh-" Issac Clark was cut off by a loud rumbling in the ship. "What was that?" Asked Red. "GREETINGS HUMANS, AND A SQUIRREL AND A HUMAN COLOR. I AM THE BEAN GOD." (I'm going to skip the introductions because I already wrote them and it's literally about five minutes worth of no jokes and long ass dialogue that goes on and on and on, you're welcome.) "ok, now that that's out of the way, what do you want?" Asked Mario. "I NEED PLEASURE." the bean god shouted. (I'm also gonna skip the shit about them asking why he needs pleasure, let's just say that after watching Zelda masterbate to tails he first found the emotion of pleasure, after that he called any people all over the universe to have one big orgy. Also if they refuse he will KILL THEM, not a cliche reason for them breaking a window and escaping at all, Right?) "ok well, we better have sex then I guess." Zelda said concealing a massive smile. "Let's try not to talk." Master chief said as he and everybody said while undressing. As Mario got nude tails noticed his huge 9 inch cock and wanted to suck it off, mario allowed tails to do so while Issac fucked Zelda. Master chief and red were the only ones left forced to fuck. "Oh yeah, shove that massive cock inside me." No one exactly knew who that was coming from, either Issac or Zelda, but Zelda said that wasn't her. Tails was downing Mario's massive nine incher like a subway sandwich to an Ethiopian child (sorry had to say that.) As Mario finally came tails swallowed every drop of cum and proceeded to kiss Mario. "Now it's my turn." The Italian plumber said reaching for tail's cock. His dick was only three inches even hard, but Mario was in his debt. Mario could easily fit all of his womb broom inside his huge mouth. It didn't take long for him to cum because of his sexual fluids were nearly escaping his ass. Zelda loved every single second of Issac fucking her, she even started to sweat in the process. "What is this sticky stuff all over your arms?" "Oh sorry about that, that's my lotion, guess it's not high quality stuff." "This isn't lotion." "What do you mean?" "ITS CUM!" Issac pulled out of the princess and finished himself off accidentally in the eye of Master chief. "Oww, I can see your kids." Master chief for some reason said. Zelda got some of the blanket on the bed and started wiping it off with a surprised expression on her face. "Yuck! That's disgusting!" Zelda screamed alerting the bean God. "MORTAL WHY HAVE YOU STOPPED" "Sorry I just lost the mood a bit" "BECAUSE OF THIS HALT I WILL JOIN IN IN MY HUMAN FORM TO PERFORM SEXUAL ACTS." Everybody watched as a huge blue flash appeared in front of them. "It's Sonic!" Zelda screamed

Sonic died awhile ago and became known as the bean god, no one knew why or how he became known as the bean god or how he got into the communications of Master chief's or Issac Clark's transmission controls. Now he was about to fuck the shit outta someone.

"Yeah that's right! Sonic's the name, speed's the game! The action of speed not the drug." He said the final part of that statement in a serious tone. DONT FRKING DUE DRUNGS! Sonic looked around the room at everyone nude and pointed is finger at Issac Clark. "That one." "What? W-what do you mean?" "I'm about to fuck the absolute shit out of your shitter!" Sonic said with a smile on his face. Sonic put his arms in the air behind him and ran up to Issac and did a cool as fuck back flip just to land his dick right in Isaac's ass. He began thrusting and thrusting until he reached climax. After sonic violently assaulted Issac's ass he shot into the air and landed on Mario's ass. Issac collapsed on the bed and curled up as sonic watched, "now that's what I call a CHILLY DOG!" Sonic said while in Mario's ass but looking at Issac still. As sonic was about to ride the Italian he spit on his dick because Mario's ass was extremely dry. Sonic began thrusting just as he did to Issac's sweet sweet ass. Sonic finished and shot up straight in the air and landed on the ground, but before he landed he said "Now that's what I call a pea-NUT butter and jelly sandwich!" While sonic was on the ground he knocked on his balls and said "yep, got a lot more in the chamber!" Mario looked at Master Chief, Zelda, Red, and Tails. "That one" he said while pointing to Zelda. Zelda was actually secretly happy like she's been the entire time, she needed a reason to get down and dirty with someone and link wouldn't say yes when she asked. Zelda showed Sonic her pussy and it was as big as a roast beef sandwich from an American Arby's. "You've packed on quite a lot of meat, but that only makes me wanna be your sauce to your French dip!" Zelda couldn't hold it in any more and screamed of pleasure whenever sonic placed his meat sword (no idea why I used that phrase) inside her. Suddenly Master Chief grabbed sonic by the neck and hurtled him across the room. "Hey what gives!" Zelda shouted. After everyone looked at her she said "oh right, this is rape." "Mother fucker you just made an enemy!" Sonic said while he shot at master chief with his armor on. Without saying a word the man in armor grabbed sonic's foot while he was in mid ball mode and choked sonic to death. The doors of the ship finally opened and everyone ran away to a multi-universal airport and went home.

THE END

I probably won't make another one of these because I hate doing shit like this, one of these days all of this fan fiction shit is going to be lead to my name and I won't be able to get a job because I made the color red fuck Issac Clark.


End file.
